Note: Thank you so so so so much for all the love you sent our way after our little announcement on Monday. We were really touched by all the sweet comments on the blog, FB and Instagram. xo
These last couple of weeks, being Theo’s mother has had its fair share (I’m being kind here) of challenging moments. I keep reminding myself that “this is typical for a two year old” and that “this is just a phase” but MAN ALIVE. Beyond the typical pushing of boundaries and testing of limits, he has started to be extremely clingy. At first, I thought it was adorable. But when he started to throw a fit when I said I was going to take a shower, the charm wore off. He is also being quite mean to his father. He tells him he doesn’t want him, he only wants “maman”. My heart aches for Mike, who obviously takes it a little personally.
I am using every ounce of patience I have to be there for him and to be understanding but, you know, some days that is more difficult to do than others. I am also acutely aware that Theo is not blind to the fact that there is another baby on the way and that some things are changing. Although I don’t think that he fully understands what it means to have a baby in one’s belly (he also claims to have one in his), he’s a smart kid who feels that changes are coming on. I definitely think that this explains a lot of his behaviour. I feel like he’s hanging onto me for fear that I will somehow not be as present when the baby arrives – I may or may not be projecting my own fears here. Although I know that my son certainly does not lack for attention, it breaks my heart to think that he might feel like I am abandoning him in a way. Letting go is an inevitability in parenting but it’s a heartbreaker isn’t it?
Our lovely daycare provider tells me that she experienced something identical when she was pregnant with her second child. In fact, she says that she didn’t know she was pregnant yet when her first born began acting out out of the blue. She finally put two and two together when she got the news. She is positive that her child sensed a change. She is also convinced that this explains why Theo is regressing and acting out. It’s an interesting theory; one that definitely speaks to the incredible bond between a mother and child.
I’m curious, how did you prepare your first born for the arrival of a sibling? And did you notice a change in your first born’s behaviour when you were pregnant with your second?